Charlie's Birth Story- Part Two

So the story picks up Saturday night...

Despite trying to go to sleep around 10:00 p.m. on Saturday, I was barely getting short naps in between the 10 minute apart contractions. To say the less, I was beyond exhausted and in so much pain.  Nevertheless, I was determined not to get induced. I wanted this baby to come on his timing (and I hate needles).

Prior to going to bed for the night, multiple nurses encouraged me to take a muscle relaxer along with a shot a morphine in order to get a good night of sleep.  I was stubborn and determined not to take anything. However, after a few hours of restlessness and pain, I agreed to taking the muscle relaxer around midnight and said if I hadn't slept in a hour, then I'd take small dose of morphine. When 1:00 a.m. hit and still no sleep, I took the dose of morphine all the while fighting the feeling of "defeat" because I had taken a med. Later, God did show me my pride through this process as well. I just wanted so badly to have as natural of a birth as possible... and we were still on that road to make that happen.

Despite the nurse's assurance that the meds would allow me to sleep through my contractions, I was still waking up through my contractions throughout the night. Whenever I'd feel a contraction coming on, I'd wake up, stand/kneel and sway until the contraction had subsided. This was a very, very long night. Praise God that this would be the last of the sleepless (laboring) nights.


Sunday

Around 7:00 a.m., I woke up and was determined to keep this labor progressing.  Despite the lack of sleep for the past three nights, I had a renewed sense of energy.

A God-sent nurse, Diane, came in and checked me. I was now dilated to a 5. She looked at me and said, "We are going to have a birthday today!" This comment brought me so much hope, however a dash of doubt lingered in my mind in light of my slow progression over the past few days. But I was not going to let the last two days discouraged me this day. I was determined to deliver a baby today!

Mary, my wonderful midwife, arrived at 7:30 a.m.; between her and Diane, one of them was always at my side this entire day of active labor. From then until Charlie was delivered, contractions were consistently 3-4 minutes apart or less. Yes, this makes for a long (but wonderful) day.

Most of my morning hours were spent on the exercising ball beside the bed, standing in the warm shower, or nibbling on food and sipping on water in between contractions.  My wonderful husband was by my side the entire day holding my hand, pressing on my back, and speaking words of encouragement through each contraction. Words are so very powerful...especially in times of pain! I am beyond thankful for his ongoing words of support and encouragement as well as the nurses and midwife's. It truly empowered me.

The afternoon hours finally rolled around.  I had progressed to a 7 and contractions continued to increase in the amount of pain and pressure I was feeling. However, at one point I thought, "Labor isn't as difficult as people make it out to be." Little did I know how differently I would think in the upcoming hours.

Around 4 PM, I had progressed passed a 7.  This was when Mary and Diane moved me into the next room with the birthing tub. I was so excited at this move- thinking Charlie would be delivered really soon! Perhaps, I was a little to wishful...

Within minutes after making my way down the hall, I was in the birthing tub. The warm water took a bit of the edge off the intense contractions.  After 45 minutes of laboring in the tub, I moved back to my good friend... the exercise ball. After some time on there, Mary said it was time to start doing the most painful positions... that meant sitting on the toilet or laying on my back. Both dreaded positions for me. I remembered though back in our birthing classes, the instructor had mentioned the positions that are most painful are the positions that are helping the baby to progress. Makes senses logically but begrudgingly I agreed only under the condition I would do just three contractions on the toilet.

Jimmy sat in front of me and I squeezed his arms as a contractions came on. It took absolutely everything in me not to get up during that contraction.  This was the point I thought I could not longer do it. I wanted to give up. I told Jimmy, "I can't do it. I can't do it. I give up!" I remember thinking, I'd do anything to have this baby out of me... even if it meant cutting it out or drugging me up. At this point, I had been dilated at a 9 for over an hour and a half... and I was just so very ready to be done. I had no energy left to continue. I just couldn't do it anymore.... so I thought.

This signaled to both the midwife and Jimmy that I was at the point of transition. While I was saying all of this to Jimmy, the midwife was giving him the thumbs up indicating that I was was transitioning out of active labor into the pushing stage.

Finally, I got the good news that I was at a 10. I could push! I could finally push! Oh was I so ready!!  After being in labor for close to three days, I was ready to get this baby out of me!  Such a relief to be able to finally push.

I moved back into the birthing tub to deliver. I was in so much pain but I was so determined.  At each contraction, I pulled my knees up with the help of the midwife, nurse and Jimmy and pushed with every ounce of energy I had.

After just a few pushes, the baby's head began to appear. What a sign of hope! Jimmy was so excited he was in tears... this too was encouraging. I too was excited to welcome our little son into this world but was not expressing it in the same manner. :)

So close. Almost there. All the hard work about to pay off!

Another contraction. Another set of pushing. Another contraction. Another set of pushing. And in the middle of these contractions, the room was silent.  The silence allowed me to focus. It was intense. There was no room for small talk. We were all business!
 
And finally, the time had come at 8:25 PM... 67 hours after contractions had started...45 minutes after I started pushing, Charles Michael Buehler was born!

Oh what a sweet relief! What an amazing feeling to have the baby outside of my womb and in my arms. A feeling of unbelief came over me...this was really our baby... this was our son.

What a beautiful gift to receive after an "indescribable" experience with an amazing team! So thankful.

A few things I took away from this labor, delivery and birth experience:

- Moving around is so helpful during contractions
- Reminding myself of the beauty of birth in the midst of the birthing process helped keep it in perspective
- Eating and drinking during labor is a must
- Labor is called "labor" for a reason--be okay with it taking longer than expected. 
- Listening to worship music and praying often was key in keeping my spirit uplifted
- Words are so powerful... they either can be disabling or empowering!
- It's such a blessing to be a part of bringing a new life into this world!

I'd love to hear anything else that you mamas took away from your own beautiful birthing processes!

Also, if you'd like to read another birthing story, check out the links below. This is a one of the many birth stories I had read that was inspiring to me!

Part One: http://summerharms.blogspot.com/2012/06/due-date-birth-story.html 
Part Two: http://summerharms.blogspot.com/2012/06/labor-days-birth-story.html 
Part Three: http://summerharms.blogspot.com/2012/06/birth-story.html

Charlie's Birth Story- Part One

This weekend as I celebrated my son's first birthday, I couldn't help but look back on what I was doing a year ago at this time. Labor, delivery, and birth. Oh yea, that's what my weekend was full of! My husband can attest, it was a very long, exhausting weekend all the while it was one of the most amazing, bonding experiences we have shared together!

During my pregnancy, I found it very helpful to read and to hear about other women's birth stories. It was free education! Prior to taking a Bradley birthing class and doing my own research/reading, I was frightened at the idea of giving birth. This fear came because it was an unknown. Never before had I given birth to another human being nor get anywhere close to such thing! So I share my experience in hopes to help any soon-to-be mama calm a few fears... just remember, what God has put in you, He will help get out! :)  

Friday
All the excitement slowly got started early Friday morning when I began waking up every 15-30 minutes with contractions. However, I kept myself from getting excited thinking they were just Braxton hicks contractions. So I got up and went to work that morning... thinking they may stop. However, by mid-morning, I headed home and Jimmy canceled his plans for the day. As the day unfolded, contractions continued every 10-20 minutes... not letting up.

Obeying our midwives' orders, we tried to get a good night's sleep. Great advice; however, with contractions happening every 10-15 minutes a good night sleep was not going to happen. The pain was strong enough to wake me up each contraction. This made for night #2 of limited sleep.

Saturday
Despite the lack of sleep, Jimmy and I were up at 7:30 and were determined to make progress.  As Jimmy timed my contraction, I was moving around, walking laps, and spending many minutes on the exercise ball. Within an hour, my contractions did start to become closer- about 6-10 minutes a part. This was exciting, but I was already getting tired. Around 10:30 a.m., Jimmy called the midwife as I was taking a warm bath.  Our midwife left the decision up to us but encouraged us to head to the hospital. I was hesitant to go because I wanted to labor as much as possible in the comfort of my own home. However, not knowing how far along I was in addition to the fatigue, Jimmy made the decision for us to start heading to St. John's in Maplewood.

We arrived at the hospital and to only receive a huge disappointment. I was only dilated to a 3.  This was such an emotional set back for us because it seemed like I had worked so hard for the last 36 hours and progressed so little.

Immediately, I regretted going in to the hospital and felt foolish.  I was set on going back home until I had progressed farther. I was just so discouraged, and so very tired.

However, our midwife was amazing. She was so encouraging, kind, and gentle with us the entire process. She encouraged me to take some muscle relaxers in addition with a shot of morphine in order to try to get some sleep.  Knowing that I had wanted as natural of a labor as possible, she wanted me to have energy to do so.  I was very opposed to taking anything... especially morphine! Despite my reluctancy, I did end up taking the muscle-relaxers. Jimmy crawled into bed with me and we tried to rest over the next few hours. However, a mixture between being in an admittance room of a hospital and still having multiple contractions, I didn't receive much rest. This makes me understand why many mamas I know have home births!

Around 4:30 Pm, I decided I'd rather just be home. However, when the nurse came in to discharge me and found I had progressed to a 4, she and our midwife encouraged us to stay. If we were closer in distance to St. John's I would have had no problem going home and continuing to labor there. However, the hour drive didn't sound appealing to me at the time.

Relieved to have finally made a decision to stay, I was now determined I was not leaving this hospital until the baby was in arms! Alright, here we go!!

Got settled into room 28, ordered supper and attempted to watch Wheel of Fortune through my contractions. Spent much of the evening moving from the exercise ball to the toilet to being on all fours on the bed. Took a bath around 9 pm which helped relax me and ease the severity and sharpness of the contractions.

In this midst of all this, my husband tried to rest as much as he could. He, too, had been lacking good sleep for the past two nights. He was an amazing partner, coach, and support.  I wouldn't have been able to do it without him.

Both realizing the baby wouldn't be coming tonight, I headed to bed. However, anyone can attest, hospital beds are not comfortable... especially when you are in labor! So I spent the majority of the night on Jimmy's pullout couch as he took the bed. And Jimmy wanted me to add, "Kelsey insisted on sleeping on the couch, I did not make her do that!"

So this marked the beginning of night #3 of limited to no sleep.

Charlie's First Birthday Party

Our home this past week was filled with cooking, cleaning and cake decorating! All in prep for a birthday party to celebrate the life of our lil' Charlie bear.

Both Jimmy and I love having people over... so what is better than an occasion to do so than a first birthday party! We are so thankful for our family and our friends who were able to make it and all those who care so much for us by loving our son.

Below are a few snapshots of the day's activities: 

Bears for our Charlie "Bear"

Sidenote: Cake decorating is not for the faint-hearted...not sure how many more birthday's I'll attempt it!

Charlie didn't devour his cake as I would have thought...

He actually preferred his gluten-free cupcakes over the chocolate cake. This mama ain't complaining! 

Jim singing his "special" birthday song to Charlie. 

Uncle Brian being an all-star uncle by manufacturing a very complicated ATV ride. 

The boys testing out the new rides!

And, I think we may need another garage for all of the new vehicles! 

  

Charlie finishes his party but getting rid of his "party in back"... good bye mullet, hello handsome! 

Stop and Sit: the Story of Mary and Martha

Although I've read the story of Mary and Martha multiple times, God has been reminding me of some rich truths through it recently.

For those who aren't familiar with the story of Mary and Martha, we find it in Luke 10:38-42. The story goes as such...

"Now as they went on their way, Jesus enter a village. And a woman named Martha welcomed him into her house. And she had a sister called Mary, who sat at the Lord's feet and listened to his teaching.  But Martha was distracted with much serving. And she went up to him and said, "Lord, do you not care that my sister has left me to serve alone?  Tell her then to help me." But the Lord answered her, Martha, Martha, you are anxious and troubled about many things, but one thing is necessary.  Mary has chosen the good portion, which will not be taken away from her."

So we see in this text that Martha was the one who welcomed Jesus into her home and despite her efforts to serve Him, Jesus said that Mary was the one who had chosen the good portion.  All the while Martha was distracted with serving, Mary's good portion was sitting at the Lord's feet and listening to His instructions.

As any of you busy mama's out there can attest, it is often easy to become distracted with serving our children, husband, families, churches, etc. And yes we see in Scripture, we are to serve... but Jesus is communicating such a rich reminder in this text.  As Christian women, our priority is to cultivate a relationship with Jesus. And we see in this text, this happens through listening to Him (through His Word) and sitting at His feet (in prayer). This is our good portion.

I often find myself presenting God with excuses as to why I'm too busy to sit and meditate on His Word...Laundry to do, supper to cook, toilet clean, and the list goes on and on. However, these excuses come because my priorities aren't correct. I, like Martha, often get caught up in doing, doing, doing... and don't make it a priority to just to sit and listen to God. However, God has given me all the time I need....I just need to prioritize sitting at the Lord's feet and listening to His teachings. And it is in those moments that I am remind this is my good portion... and wow, is it so good for my soul!

Marriage. 3 years. Lessons learned.

Tomorrow marks three years of happy wedding bliss for Jimmy and me! Like any married couple would concur, not every moment of marriage is blissful, however, it has been beautiful! Beautiful because God has been at work!  He has used my marriage to teach me more about Himself, more about another human being, and more about myself.  

A few things I've learned (thus far) through my marriage:

1.       Marriage is to be a reflection of Christ and the church. My husband is the head of our family and I am to submit to him. Although I’m not always the best at this...this is how it works best! It's God's design- see Ephesians 5:22-33.

2.       Communication is key.

3.       I am not always right. No matter how much I think I am.

4.       Having children is not something to be afraid of...even if that meant sooner than we expected. Having Charlie has been a blessing, a joy and a true gift from God.

5.       Shared hobbies help us connect…gardening, cooking, photography and taking short adventures together are some of our favorites.

6.       My husband is my biggest fan and support.

7.       Honesty is so important. 

8.       I definitely take up more than half of the bed.

9.       My selfishness often gets in the way of loving my husband. 

10.   Praying for my husband is more helpful than nagging him.

11.   I don’t always need to order the pizza I want.

12.   Laughing together is a real good thing. 

13.   It's more worthwhile to fight for my marriage… rather than fighting in my marriage.

14.   Communicating our expectations helps things go much more smoothly.

15.   Jimmy is not my savior. Jesus is.

16.   Being in fellowship with the church body is rich and valuable for our marriage.

17.  Being in God's Word individually helps us grow in our relationship with Jesus and with one another. 

I love my husband today in a deeper, richer way than the day I married him. And am so grateful to be able to celebrate three married years with James! Thank you God for giving us grace to love each other and thank you James for making marriage so enjoyable!

What makes Mama smile: Monday Moments

A Recap of Monday's Activities in the Buehler's home.

Charlie slept through the night! Went down around 7 pm last night, nursed at about 6 am and then back to bed for a short snooze until 7:45 am. Wow, what an amazing way to start off the Monday! And, I'm sure any mama can attest that this is such a blissful beginning to a week! 

And who doesn't love a good pair of long johns! 

Once Jimmy was off to work, I ran downstairs to start a load of cloth diapers... leaving the little one in charge of the upstairs. Yes, I should have known by now this may be dangerous. Upon my return, I find the little Peanut dipping his hands in the toilet water all the while the entire roll of toilet paper lies unrolled beside him. He must know as soon as his mama is out of sight, it's his time to stir up some trouble! :) 

And finally, this is just one of those priceless moments that you just gotta love as a mom... and you love it enough to run and grab the camera just to snap a picture of the memory! Charlie's ball had rolled under the chair and this was his attempt to recover it. Oh, it's the simple things that put a smile on a mama's face!

It is here! And I love it.

October. 

Yesterday marked the first day of my favorite month. I absolutely love October because it is filled with so many things to enjoy in 31 days! Below is a list of why I love this month...

10 Reasons Why I Love October-

1. Fall. In my opinion, October has the best fall weather, smells and colors!
2. "Love"ly memories. I met Jimmy, started dating him and married him all in the month of October (of course, that all didn't happen in the same October).
3. Apple Orchards.  Who doesn't like picking fresh, delicious apples!?
4.  Lil' Charlie bear.  He was born the 28th and will be celebrating his 1st birthday at the end of this month! Ah, it's so amazing how much you can love a little human!
5. Football. Although I'm not a diehard fan, I do enjoy relaxing with my husband on Sunday afternoon's watching the game. Also- I do miss the days of cheering on my brothers at their high school football games! 
6. Birthdays.  My best friend, Kristina, is celebrating her 25th birthday today and my mom is celebrating her 50th birthday on Sunday. Two very dear women in my life!
7. Sweaters. Just nice to pull them out after a Minnesota summer.
8. Pumpkin Pickin'! This year we had our own "pumpkin patch" in our backyard that we got to pick over a dozen pumpkins from. My husband loved me by letting me plant a bunch despite him thinking they are a waste of space!
9.  Fall parties and gatherings with friends... which usually include the following: chili, fresh bread and apple crisp...
10. Harvest. I grew up on the farm so I gotta love harvest season! The combines in the fields mark another growing season coming to
an end! 

I'm sure as the month goes on I'll find additional things I love... but for now, I'm excited to have 29 more days to enjoy October!